Is Will Be Was

What is, is. But was too, was once is. Will be, will soon be is. So why didn’t was remain is? And why cant is be will be? Uncertainty is the one thing man will never be able to tame.

Some of us live our lives planning for the future. But as the future arrives you realise you’re not quite the ant who saved up for a rainy day. There are quite a few leaks in the roof of life that you didn’t foresee. So now you’re left to plan again. But does it ever become rain proof?

A lot many others believe ‘living in the moment’. They take pride in not planning, living untamed. But they too are victims. They believe in uncertainty. Because they are unsure what tomorrow’s sunrise will bring, they dance tonight.

Is and was has always traumatized me. Much of my time has been spent perfecting is but it soon became was. But not the was that blossomed into is. A different kind of is altogether, which caught me unprepared. Now I’m worried about spending time on is again, will it blossom into will be or new flow charts will have to be drawn.

I’m tired, confused and just want to be.

Bachna Ae Hasseno

Does the United States government keep alien spaceships at Area 51? There might not be enough evidence to validate that. But there is enough evidence to validate that Yash Raj banner should take a break from associating themselves with any more movies. After a series of flamboyant catastrophes like Neil & Nikki, Tashan, Todha Pyaar Thoada magic, it’s Bachna Ae Haseeno.

However, watching Ranbir Kapoor was like being under the influence of anesthesia. The pain was numbed to large degrees. The movie is shot in breathtaking locals of Zurich, Italy & Australia. At times I felt the dazzling outdoor was so mesmerizing, that the actors easily disappeared into the background.

The long and short of it - Don Juan Kapoor (Ranbir) meets Mahi (Minissha) on the U rail. Mahi, like most of us, is suffering from ‘Simran-ness’ an incurable phenomenon that defies explanation – DDLJ and is constantly on the lookout for the perfect love story. Her story progresses as she meets Raj, they miss the train to Zurich, sing a song and she falls in love. However, when she accidentally overhears him spinning tales (to his friends) of his imaginary manhood and the time they spent together, she realizes his pyaar was jhoota and that’s how Mahi ka dil toota.

Couple of years down the line, enter Radhika (Bipasha), an upcoming model/heroine who is romanced by Raj but is left stranded & soaking in a shaadi ka joda and mehndi on the steps of the marriage registrar’s office. Radhika ne manga sindoor but Raj bhag chukka tha bahut duur.

By now my anesthesia is wearing off and I can start to feel the pain.

Australia, taxis and Gayatri is what Raj meets next. She’s (Deepika) independent, educated, drives a taxi by night and works at a super mart by day to support her masters. She doesn’t believe in love or marriage but wears beautiful outfits and sings songs at the 12 Apostles. When Raj finally falls in love which up till now was just a game, Gayatri wants none of it and walks away, oh what a shame!

Hurting, he realizes, jab dil toot ta hai to hota hai dard, phir woh koi aurat ho ya mard!
Up until now, his character must have thrown up a few names in your head, but none of them ever come back to apologize for breaking your heart. That’s when he begins to differ from all those guys you met while growing up. He tracks down Mahi but before her we meet her husband Joginder (Kunal Kapoor). Yaara menu Papajis badde sone lagne lagge hai.

Apologizing will not be as easy as ringing a door bell. But Raj has to bring back Mahi’s faith in love, in romance, in goodness, in her marriage, everything she believed in before that fatal day. It’s a movie and he succeeds.

Next, Radhika. How do you ask for forgiveness from someone you stranded at the altar? You don’t. You can only be forgiven if the person decides to become a bigger human being. It’s rare. But it’s also a movie, and he returns successful back to Australia.

By now Gayatri has written hundreds of letters, which he finds in his apartment, confessing a change in her opinion on marriage and love. Thank god, because by now I’m ready to scream! Predictable? Just like the ending.

The music helped though, Vishal and Shekhar have done a good job with recreating the title track ‘Bachna Ae Hasseeno’. Other songs like ‘Ahista Ahista’ and ‘Khuda Jaane’ gave me a reason to forgive.

Kumar is Kinng

I'm tempted to believe the ‘k’ factor does prove lucky. Akshay Kumar over & over, yet again has proved that he’s one of the finest, most underrated actors the industry is blessed with today. Singh is Kinng is out and out an Akshay Kumar fest. The way he’s shaping up, with each passing movie, it wouldn’t be surprising if they hike up ticket prices to watch his movies.

There are Heroes…there are Superheroes.. and then there are Sardars. Anees Bazmees’ portrayal of this theory resulted in a hilarious 2 hour 15 min production. Just perfect. Not only did the lead pair Katrina & Akshay do justice but all the supporting sardars, they rocked! An ace of a stylist, Shabina Khan has changed my perception that a sardar is a sardar is a sradar. If we can have more of Akhshay, Sonu Sood and Himanshu Pandey look alikes, then bring it on I say!
It’s a shame that the supporting cast of successful films usually don’t get enough credit.

The story is based on the glorification of Punjabis, a community that knows how to live it big. Shot in parts of Australia, Egypt & tiny pieces of Punjab, the movie has been subjected to the wrath of staunch believers who've attacked the trimmed beards sported in the movie as an offense to pious ideologies. I’d like to request all those who consider this movie sacrilege, to look at the bigger picture. See the beauty in the way the big heartedness of Punjabis is celebrated, soak up the innocence.

The cinematography of the movie along with the dialogues, choreography, songs is all well directed. Katrina Kaif has done well in placing a well deserved slap on the faces of all those who thought all her movies were only courtesy her beau. With a series of hits, she’s been successful in convincing her fit in a Punjabi setting. Even with her anglicized Hindi, British accent, Punjab has accepted this kudi with its kheth wide open. Directors are now letting her dub in her own voice, which is another step towards victory.

Pritam has done a good job with the music and before I figure out sources of his inspiration I must admit my favorite is ‘Tenu Ghodi kinne chadaya Bhutani ke, tenu Dulha Kinne banaya Bhutani ke’

Khasab

Adventurous, living the moment, being spontaneous, is everything I’m not. Especially if it involves waking up at 6:am in the middle of the night, on a weekend!
But there was no better time than the onset of a long weekend to change things so we decided to go all out. And all out we did. We drove to Khasab - located in Musandam directorate, the northern part of Oman, separated from the rest of Oman by the north of the United Arab Emirates. It is about a 160 Kms from Dubai(directions).

Khasab is known for fishing and smuggling in small, fast boats, to and from Iran. They are destined for the Emirates and Saudi Arabia. A variety of goods are taken back to Iran for sale. Cigarettes are the main export though scrap metal and white goods form a significant part. Due to its geographical position and mountainous terrain it was isolated from the rest of Oman and the region developed at its own pace. Only in 1980 was the first track made to reach from the border.

The scenic view from Khasab says a lot more than its economy. We finally left Dubai at 7:am, and the trip towards the Ras-Al-Khaima border was an hour.

UAE Border

I was quite surprised at not being greeted by long queues at both the UAE & Oman borders. The exit fees from the UAE border cost AED 30/per person and entry into Oman AED 20/person.

Oman Border

Leaving the border was the beginning of a picturesque weekend. Khasab lay two hours ahead. Long winding roads embraced the calm gulf waters. As the sun shone above, the stars twinkled below. Even if it took longer, the journey was nothing short of breathtaking.

The 40 degrees outside did not stop us from driving with our windows down occasionally to breathe in what our eyes behold.

I wasnt kidding!

We pulled into the Golden Tulip Hotel at about 11:15 am, and were rearing to go on the dolphin sighting trip. Chances of seeing Dolphins in the afternoon, is reduced by 50%, and that’s something to keep in mind for the next time. But before that – lunch, their buffet was not too exciting but you have the option of either doing the full course or only the salad, soup & desert option

In mid summer the one hour boat trip to a reef which included dolphin sighting and snorkeling was surprisingly pleasant for 1:45 pm. The Musandam Peninsula has an abundance of sheltered fjords, miles of sparkling blue water, rocky mountains, birds and yes, two dolphins added to the breeze. I felt a bit cheated out of my experience because the guy maneuvering our boat did not make any attempts to attract the dolphins closer, so all aboard had to be satisfied by watching the dolphins’ spring to the claps, cheers and whistles of the boat opposite at a distance. We tried doing the same but apparently they respond to a particular kind noise made by whistling. No experience there. It seemed like an experience too surreal. I’ve seen so many pictures set in similar scenarios, that by now I’m not convinced if it wasn’t just my imagination.

Snorkeling was disappointing because the anchor point wasn’t really a reef. Snoppy Island in Fujairah hosts a much larger smorgasbord of marine life, they even have 4 resident black reef sharks! But having said that, this was a different experience, never before have I gotten into the sea without a proper life jacket, broken zippers, strings barely there, snorkeling gear a size too small and all this included in the price you pay for the boat trip. So all those heading there, either carry your own gear, or ensure you rush to get yours first after boarding.

The boat ride back seemed like an empty pistol, no longer loaded but yet a pistol.
On the way out of the city we tried to look for small baklavas but found none that served tea or coffee. Pathetic, what the Bebsi (Pepsi) generation has amounted to!
At the end of the trip as I soaked my fingers into butter chicken and garlic naans, reminiscing, I was only too happy to have tapped into the half adventurous & spontaneous side of my spine.

No, I havent taken this but next time I will!